As a Pastafarian, I hereby wish to share Holiday greetings with you from the Flying Spaghetti Monster by wishing all a “Merry Chrifsmas.”
R’Amen
Spam
‘Tis the season of festivities and bombardment of our in boxes and web browsers with a large amount of pointless junk that is aimed at redirecting our thoughts at best, and harvesting our data at worst.
Be careful how you use your mouse out there.
For those of you who may want a little back story as to why we call this bombardment of unwanted electronic dross spam, here’s a short explanation.
Back in 1970, the Quintessentially British comedians of Monty Python’s Flying Circus constructed a sketch whereby a hapless customer, Mrs Bun, and the waitress of the Green Midget Cafe in Bromley have an argument over the fact that everything on the menu comes with spam. Add in some singing vikings (obviously) and the rest, as they say, is comedic history.
The first spam message has been attributed to Gary Thuerk, who sent an unsolicited email to 600 people over ARPANET back in 1978. He was told he was a naughty boy and not to do it again. (How very Monty Python)
When more people started using the world wide web (or emails to start with) to send unsolicited emails for products and services that were unwanted it seemed a natural extension for those who were in control of geekdom, and who have a particular liking for Monty Python, to use the term “spam”.
In 2009 it was estimated that dealing with spam cost around US$130 billion. For context Hormel, the manufacturers of true Spam, had a revenue of US$8.2 billion in 2012
~Richard
#lovespam #hatespam
Missing the Point
On Friday we went to see the original line up of Culture Club who are currently on their US tour and were visiting The Electric Factory in Philadelphia. The venue was new to us and we were very pleased with the fact that it was general admission standing only, just like my old student days back in London in the 1980s. With beer in hand we were fairly near the front and the gig was excellent. Boy George interacted really well with the audience and it really felt like an intimate “club gig”.
One thing that really pissed me off though was the huge overuse of cellphones during the gig. Not only did they cast a lot of light back to the audience but some idiots even used their flashed (totally pointless) not only for photos but also when video recording. Quite why anyone would go to a gig, especially one where you are so close to the stage, and then watch the whole show through their 5” phone screen is totally beyond my understanding. I am beginning to think that modern audiences are getting even more mindless. They may as well have stayed at home. Just to my left there were 5 or 6 of these clowns, as you can see. I am pretty sure that a couple of them filmed every song that was song and so therefore didn’t look directly at the stage even once during the performance.
I guess we’re slowly sinking into the abyss of not even wanting to experience reality when we can. How ironic it is that theses guys are missing the whole point of a “live” gig while concentrating on streaming it to Facebook.
How soon they grow up to fly the nest
Although it’s a few years away until my children will truly “fly the nest” today was the day when my youngest daughter literally flew away from me. She joined 31st Wing Civil Air Patrol earlier this year and today was her chance for her orientation flight. After an initial briefing by her instructor and a detailed walk around the Cessna 172P for pre-flight checks, the mist had finally lifted and she was ready to leave the ground. It was quite nerve wracking watching her taxi out and fly away, and I know the feeling too, as both I and my wife have flown single-engine planes when we were students a long time ago. In fact, as I told her on the way home, she’s the third generation of our family to do this as my father was in the Air Cadets in the UK as a teenager and also flew small planes.
When she landed she had a smile as wide as the Cheshire Cat’s from Alice in Wonderland. She had basic instruction and flew the plane for a while on her 45 minutes in the air. And at 14, she has now flown a plane in advance of sitting behind the wheel of a car.
I think she’s hooked!
A Century of National Park Service
Today is the 100th anniversary of the National Park Service, created to protect the wonderful tracts of wilderness, defined by Congress as National Parks, for all time. There are 59 of these sites spread across 27 states, and covering nearly 52 million acres (210,000 km2) and they truly represent something special.
My first introduction to them was many years ago as a teenager in the UK when I stumbled across the amazing work of Ansel Adams, particularly his stunning photography of the mountains in Yosemite, that were sold regularly in shops such as Athena, on the UK High Street. I had a huge poster of Half Dome on my wall for many years.
I would never have believed at that time that 25 years later I would actually be emigrating to the US, visiting Redwood and Yosemite National Parks from my new home in California and be able to take my own photographs.
The National Park Service does a great job of fulfilling their mandate to protect the National Parks and they also have a really nice website to educate us all on the parks and the other areas that are affiliated to the NPS or managed by them, such as National Historic Sites, Scenic Trails, Recreation Areas, Memorials, Battlefields, Heritage Corridors, and Waterways.
So, next time you or your family want some real quality time why not turn off the TV, check out their site and then leave your technology at home and enjoy some of the beautiful countryside that the United States has to offer?
Happy 100th NPS!
~Richard
Flip Top Head
I admit it, have a problem. When I come home from work I am like some half-starved animal desperate to eat anything that I can my hands on. If I can find an opened bag of chips or some other savory snack then I will attack it and pour it down my throat to satisfy my need for crunchy carbs.
Weird thing is though, if the bags haven’t been opened I am able to resist the urge to do so. It’s almost like there’s a magical charm on them. It’s a bit like inviting a vampire into your house, once the invitation is there it’s a free for all.
This also gives me the excuse to blame other people for my piggish behavior. “If you hadn’t opened the bag, I wouldn’t be eating it,” I cry as a pathetic excuse.
Sometimes I feel as though I may as well have a flip top head…
~Richard
(*ChipGuy animation by Georgie)
Technology updates – a bit of a curate’s egg.
The term “curate’s egg” is one I use occasionally but is almost exclusively unknown by American friends and colleagues, who usually stare back at me with bewilderment. It originated from a cartoon in the British satirical publication, Punch way back in 1895 and subsequently became part of the English language, at least for some.
Bishop: “I’m afraid you’ve got a bad egg, Mr Jones”; Curate: “Oh, no, my Lord, I assure you that parts of it are excellent!”
[“True Humility” by George du Maurier, originally published in Punch, 9 November 1895.]
Originally it summed up the old British stereotype of “stiff upper lip” and “carry on” attitude, basically suggesting that, no matter how bad a situation, we should make the best of it, and just get on with it.
Sterling stuff, indeed!
These days I think the meaning has been changed slightly to mean a mixture of good and bad, although mainly bad.
Now, I could think of some deep and meaningful situation to apply this to, perhaps stretching it to to the current US Presidential Race, for example, but instead I am going to be very self-indulgent (as if writing a blog isn’t self-indulgent enough!) I will use this phrase to provide a promised update on the two technical activities I blogged about recently, namely the upgrade to my beloved (?) Asus laptop, and secondly, repair of my daughter’s iPhone 5c.
The laptop upgrade to a solid state drive (SSD) was meant to be “just” a case of cloning my original disk and then swapping it, so I duly procured a named SSD: (Crucial 480GB) and swapped out my second HDD so I could do the business using EaseUS Todo Backup software.
The problems started immediately when Windoze7 wouldn’t recognize the SSD so I had to use disk manager to initialize it for it to be usable. Cloning was fairly straightforward but the next snag came when Windoze wouldn’t boot up from the new drive, even when selecting it in BIOS. A few hours of head scratching and reading on the interweb, and not really wanting to play about in the Registry too much, and I ended up downloading Macrium Reflect to see if this could help.
This natty software, like that from EaseUS, is free to use for 30-days, but unlike the former it comes with a much better 350+ page pdf user guide which is very helpful. Cranking up Macrium Reflect for the first time I was prompted to create a Windows PE bootable rescue disk (or USB in my case as I have no drives!). Rebooting from this USB and I only had to follow a few prompts on the menus to get my newly minted SSD recognised as a bootable drive.
Rebooting again, with fingers crossed and success, my old Asus was flying again!
Now to the iPhone 5c story. An investment of $10 plus shipping for a new battery and $5 for the tool set needed (a tiny screwdriver set, including the infamous “pentalobe” required (designed) by Apple, plastic pry bars and a suction cup) and I was ready to go.
Opening the case was easy but why on earth (yes, I think you can probably guess why) did Apple have to stick the battery to the case with such strong adhesive? After very carefully prodding and pulling I managed to release the old battery and replace with the new one. Reattaching everything I eagerly plugged it into the charger. Nothing. Except for a low hum from the phone there was no sign of life. No combination button presses to reset it! So, ok the “genius” in the store was right after all – it’s broken! It still irks me though that they made no effort to open up the phone and even take a look at it, leaving me to do that. I guess that is genius (or at least cost-effective) customer service from their perspective.
So, all in all a bit of a curate’s egg for my weekend of technology. Good in part!
As a final piece to this story, when Punch Magazine closed in 1992, after 151 years, they re-published their famous cartoon in their final edition. This time they revised the caption to reflect how much modern society had changed over the century between publication:
Curate: “This f***ing egg’s off!”
So much for progress?
~Richard
My kind of sushi, at last!
My family love sushi, but I am unenamored by the stuff. I will eat most things and, although have never had the opportunity to try the infamous delicacy of lutefisk, I have consumed grubs, insects, cacti, and many other items that many may consider “off the wall.”
However, sushi and I have never clicked. I just don’t see the fascination in tiny pieces of raw fish wrapped, however beautifully, in sticky rice, even when presented on a conveyor belt. It’s not only the texture but probably the fact that I studied parasitology that also puts me off – a pathological fear of raw meat, perhaps? So, for me it’s usually the teriyaki chicken option whenever I begrudgingly go a Japanese restaurant. Add to this the weird obsession that Americans have with insisting on using chopsticks (which I can use), and I find the whole experience unsatisfying. This latter characteristic always amuses me. When we eat my favorite cuisine, Indian, no one seems to want to use their right hand only and no cutlery to be more authentic so why would we insist on using a couple of wooden sticks for Japanese or Chinese food when we have forks available?
Anyhow, I digress. Today my daughter was attending a friend’s birthday party and decided she wanted to take along some fruit sushi as her contribution to the international food theme. I helped a little bit in preparing the sweet sticky rice by simmering it with sugar and coconut milk, and then let her loose with the creativity.
It didn’t actually take her long to create some great sushi with mango, pineapple, kiwi, peach, strawberries and blackberries. I was fortunate to be allowed some of the leftovers when she was plating it up and they were delicious!
Finally, I have discovered some sushi I actually enjoy!
~Richard
So many questions
“Have I noticed how many people seem to talk to themselves in questions and then answer themselves?”
“Well, yes, as a matter of fact, I have!”
“Do I find it annoying that what was once the quirky behavior of a few US politicians has found its way into the speech patterns of a lot of people?”
“Absolutely!”
“Do I have a theory for why this inane way of speaking started?”
“Yes, I do”
“Do I want to share it?”
“OK, I will. I am convinced that it originated fairly recently, in the last decade perhaps, during TV interviews and was adopted by interviewees who wanted to direct the interview to ensure their message was aired, irrespective of what questions are being asked. It probably came through media training.”
“Do I think it’s a successful technique?”
“Well, it’s spreading and it seems to give the impression that the interviewer is responding to a question that’s been posed to them, even though they aren’t. It’s a sneaky way of adding fake credibility to a statement that indirectly suggests the interviewer is being challenged. It’s quite clever really.”
“Why do I think it continues?”
“Probably because TV interviewers are too lazy to challenge the interviewer, and no-one seems to care.”
“Do I think that we’ll see even more of this inane behavior seeping into normal conversation?”
“Oh yes, it’s already fairly well established in Corporate speak, which is always quick to assimilate new trends and I have heard it being used even in social situations.”
“And what will I do about it?”
“I’ll probably write a short blog post about how this really annoys me.”
“Thank me.”
“I’m welcome! Thank me too, for giving me the opportunity answer my questions.”
😉
Why do we put up with this Crapple?
Warning: this is going to be a longer rant than usual.
Yesterday, I spent just under 4 hours trying to sort out my daughter’s broken iPhone and achieved precisely nothing. Yes, the Apple Store staff members were all very friendly, but I cannot but think it’s all a farce they’re playing out in order to keep the world’s biggest company (at least from a “stock value” perspective) in their top slot.
Whatever happened to simple customer service and just “doing the right thing?”
I’m old enough to remember when Apple was considered “the little person’s friend” who railed against the men in grey (or, at that time, Big Blue) suits who ran “big, bad corporate America”. These days, it seems to me, that all Apple really achieved was to get the dark suits traded in for west coast casual dress sense, and that’s about all.
It seems that long gone are the days of the concept that “in America the customer is King” that my father opined years ago. These days all anyone wants is to get you to dump your expensive technology and upgrade for yet more money. I can almost hear the metallic voices of the Cybermen barking this whenever I enter an Apple Store: “You will be upgraded!”
So, let me regale you with the story that sparked this rant. Notwithstanding the suspicious way in which my daughters iPhone 5c suddenly died weeks after the warranty expired, we naively drove 30+ miles to our nearest Apple Store to see if any of their geniuses could diagnose and fix it. At 6pm we were efficiently told it would be an hour to 90 minute wait and they would text us when a “technician” would be available. All well and good, thinks I. I won’t bore you with the details but we finally got to see someone at 9:10, just after the store’s official closing time. I am grateful for those staff that stayed on to see those who had been waiting for 3 hours, but I do wonder why they bother.
After explaining that whilst carrying it in the street the phone had dimmed, blanked out and then got so hot we thought it would ignite, the genius looked unconcerned. “Looks like we have a dead phone” was his learned diagnosis after taking out the sim card and peering into the slot with a light. “Can’t see any liquid,” so we assume the battery didn’t melt.
Then the rub. It’s a model they haven’t sold for a few months and as it is (just) over a year old they “can’t replace it.” Strangely though, they could provide me with the same (outdated?) model if I was willing to pay them $269, and generously they’d give me a 90-day warranty. Eh? …pause,,, “or you could consider an upgrade for $369.” Trap laid.
Hmm, not known for parting with money so easily, I head homeward with my disgruntled family, none the wiser for my consultation with the Apple “genius” who didn’t even offer to diagnose it further or repair it.
Unbelievable!
I guess, despite the high cost of consumer electronics, we now have to expect them to break in a short period and be discarded. My generation and those before us simply throw up our hands in bemusement at the world. Gone are the days when anything lasted, or could be repaired.
Anyhow, back at the ranch I consult the trusty interweb and see that if I undo 4 screws (2 outside and 2 inside) and use a suction cup I could examine, and possibly replace the battery in under 3 minutes for the princely sum of $10 plus shipping ($17 total). Apple couldn’t even be bothered to do this to check if the battery was the problem. Genius.
I have ordered the battery and hope to report my results back in a later post, but to me it was the final nail in the Apple myth.
They have truly become what they initially despised, and we all let them get away with it. Their Orwellian destiny has been fulfilled: we all love (Big Brother) Apple.
Steve Jobs would be proud…
~Richard
(* PacApple Animation by Georgie)
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